On the Issues
- Instead of focusing on the size of government, à la Bill Clinton, Obama talks about whom it should be working for—the majority of the American people, rather than special interests.
- Would you like Lil Wayne more if he were Big Wayne? Obama sure wouldn't.
- Obama advocates a "watchful eye" (15.3) for the free market.
- Citizens were angry that financial institutions had been acting like their parents weren't home and taking some seriously out-of-control risks on investments and loans. Well, the bank's parents just drove up the driveway.
- Obama promises a return to American ideals on international relations and defense. He compares American values to a light for the rest of the world (16.3).
- Sort of like the world's Patronus…which takes the shape of a bald eagle, naturally. He promises that America will "lead once more" (17.2).
- Referencing World War II, Obama argues that America's ideals, not its military might and weapons, make the country strong. And he reminds us that with great power comes great responsibility, so get your finger off that big, red button.
- In a single, magical paragraph, Obama promises to end the war in Iraq, create peace in Afghanistan, reduce nuclear stockpiles, and save the world from global warming. Ambitious much?
- Obama disses dictators around the world, saying that America will "outlast" them (20.2). Basically, he sees you, bad guys, and you are definitely not going to break America's spirit.
- And now, it's diversity time. Obama shouts out the world's major religions and says that America will achieve prosperity if all kinds of people get along. Our differences make us stronger, much in the same way that if you dip a French fry in a milkshake, you achieve a new level of sublime snacking. But we digress.
- The president reaches out to the Muslim world. One of his goals is to improve relations with Muslim countries in the hope of fighting radical terrorist cells with kindness.
- Obama speaks to the world outside America for a bit. He promises to help poor countries, assures rich countries that the United States will behave itself, and tells dictators that he is willing to negotiate with them. He's basically saying, "Bring me all the countries."
- Obama gives a shout-out to the military, thanking soldiers who currently serve overseas and veterans who gave their lives. It's never a bad idea for a politician to praise the military.
- The big kicker: Obama says that the American people need to adopt a spirit of teamwork, faith, and determination. Kind of like a halftime pep talk in Friday Night Lights: "clear eyes, full hearts, can't lose."