First of all, it’s spelled B-O-L-O-G-N-A. Second, if you have racked up too many negligent driver points, your license will either be suspended or revoked by the MVD. You can apply for a new license at the end of this period, and hopefully you’ve changed your ways by then. Oh, sure, it starts with a few minor traffic violations here and there, but before you know it you’ll be committing grand larceny, bank fraud, and/or treason. We just don’t want to start seeing your name in the paper. Unless it’s for inventing some useful electronic gadget, or winning a peace prize. That would be pretty cool.

Each time you have a mark on your record, it stays there for six years (or longer, if you did something really shady). During a six-year period, your license can be suspended for two years if you accumulate 6-7 points, three years if you accumulate 8-9 points, four years if you accumulate 10-12 points, five years if you accumulate 13-15 points, or six year if you accumulate 16 or more points. If you can put up 30 points in 42 minutes, you’ll probably make tonight’s highlight reel on ESPN.
Like a Vandal in the Wind
If you absolutely must destroy something, either break a pencil or beat up on your pillow. It’s far too costly to be caught doing anything worse, such as spray-painting graffiti onto the side of a bridge or keying your ex-boyfriend’s Mustang. If already licensed, you can lose your license for a couple years; if you’re not there yet, you can have the issuance of your license delayed for several years. And you’re going to need your license, because it sounds like you’ll have to be doing a lot of running from the authorities.

Like a Vandal in the Wind

If you absolutely must destroy something, either break a pencil or beat up on your pillow. It’s far too costly to be caught doing anything worse, such as spray-painting graffiti onto the side of a bridge or keying your ex-boyfriend’s Mustang. If already licensed, you can lose your license for a couple years; if you’re not there yet, you can have the issuance of your license delayed for several years. And you’re going to need your license, because it sounds like you’ll have to be doing a lot of running from the authorities.

Here are a few examples of what can get you points on your driving record:

2-pointers

• Perjury or making a false oath to the Department of Public Safety
• Driving while under suspension, revocation, or denial

3-pointers

• Driving while under and alcohol or drug-related revocation
• Any shot made from beyond the 3-point arc

4-pointers

• Driving while barred
• Driving while under the influence of alcohol or a drug or having an alcohol concentration of .08 or more

5-pointers

• Felony offenses
• Hit and run
• Eluding or attempting to elude law enforcement
• Serious injury caused by the operation of a motor vehicle
• Rear-ending someone important, like Elijah Wood

6-pointers

• Manslaughter resulting from the operation of a motor vehicle