You might be a finely responsible young man or woman, but statistics don't lie. You have too many minor brethren that make up the majority of motor vehicle crashes.

So, to protect everyone from your relatively high odds of crashing, we rein you in, especially during your teenage years.

You'll first get this piece of paper that says "Learner's Permit" on it. You're permitted to drive, but you have to have a licensed driver who's 21 years of age or older and who has at least one year of driving experience in the front passenger seat at all times. And you can only drive between 5:00AM and 12:00AM if you're under 18 unless you have a licensed parent or guardian with you.

This bears repeating. You can't drive alone. Anywhere. This is huge. If a cop catches you driving alone with only a Learner's Permit, it's likely that you won't get your real license until you're at least 18.

Think you're cool because you're 16 or 17 and have your restricted license? You still can't drive between the hours of 12:30AM and 5:00AM without a parent or legal guardian in your passenger seat unless you're driving to or from work. And for the first six months, you can't drive anyone under the age of 18 unless that person is a member of your immediate family, or you have that licensed 21-year-old driver with 1+ year of driving experience in your front passenger seat.

The belief is that in this probationary time, you'll be extra super extra extra cautious. And if you're not, then you aren't ready to be inflicted on everyone else who has to use the same roads as you.

And while we're on the subject, if you're caught breaking any of these restrictions, or if you're convicted of any moving traffic violations while you still have your permit or restricted license, you won't be able to upgrade to the next level of driving coolness for a long time.

Already feeling antsy? Want to upgrade your Learner's Permit to a restricted license? Let's play a little game to see if you're eligible.

Learner's Permit: Choose Your Own Adventure (As Long As It Sticks to State Rules)

Let's say you've had your Learner's Permit for a while now and want to upgrade:

A. Are you 18 or older? If YES, go to B. If NO, go to C.
B. Congrats! None of this applies to you.
C. Have you had your Learner's Permit for at least six months? If YES, go to D. If NO, go to E.
D. Have you successfully avoided incurring a moving traffic violation within the last six months? If YES, go to F. If NO, go to E.
E. Sorry kid, you're gonna have to wait a while.
F. Has a parent, legal guardian, or responsible adult driver aged 21 or older certified that you have had at least 40 hours of driving practice, and have you completed a state-approved driver education course that included 30 hours of classroom instruction, 12 hours of in-car, behind-the-wheel training, and six hours of in-car experience observing other student drivers? If YES, go to G. If NO, go to E.
G. Have you passed a driving test? If YES, go to H. If NO, go to E.
H. Congrats! You're the proud owner of a shiny new Class D Massachusetts Junior Operator's License.