Why Should I Care About This Driver Record Baloney?

Why Should I Care About This Driver Record Baloney?

First of all, it’s spelled B-O-L-O-G-N-A. Second, if you have racked up too many negligent driver points, your license will either be suspended or revoked by the DMV. You can apply for a new license at the end of this period, and hopefully you’ve changed your ways by then. Oh, sure, it starts with a few minor traffic violations here and there, but before you know it you’ll be committing grand larceny, bank fraud, and/or treason. We just don’t want to start seeing your name in the paper. Unless it’s for inventing some useful electronic gadget, or winning a peace prize. That would be pretty cool.

Each time you have a mark on your record, it stays there for 36 months (or longer, if you did something really shady). Your license can be suspended for 60 days if you accumulate 12 points within a 36-month period. Your license will be suspended for another six months if you accrue eight more points within 36 months of having your license reinstated. If you can put up 30 points in 42 minutes, you’ll probably make tonight’s highlight reel on ESPN.

Like a Vandal in the Wind

If you absolutely must destroy something, either break a pencil or beat up on your pillow. It’s far too costly to be caught doing anything worse, such as spray-painting graffiti onto the side of a bridge or keying your ex-boyfriend’s Mustang. If already licensed, you can lose your license for a couple years; if you’re not there yet, you can have the issuance of your license delayed for several years. And you’re going to need your license, because it sounds like you’ll have to be doing a lot of running from the authorities.

Here are a few examples of what can get you points on your driving record:

1-pointers

  • Littering
  • Free throws, RBIs, PATs, and hockey and soccer goals

2-pointers

  • Most minor moving violations
  • Child restraint violation
  • Slam dunks and safeties

3-pointers

  • Speeding in a posted school zone
  • Failure to report an accident when such a report is required
  • Driving without insurance
  • Failure to stop for a siren
  • Driving without a license/with a license expired more than one year
  • Running a red light or stop sign
  • Failure to yield the right-of-way
  • Speeding in excess of 55mph
  • Field goals and any shot made from beyond the 3-point arc

4-pointers

  • Failure to yield the right-of-way to a bicycle, motorcycle, or motor scooter
  • Failure to yield the right-of-way to a pedestrian
  • Illegal passing
  • Driving on the wrong side of the road
  • Following too closely
  • Hit and run involving only property damage
  • Reckless driving
  • Rear-ending someone important, like Cam Newton

5-pointers

  • Aggressive driving
  • Passing a stopped school bus