You might be a finely responsible young man or woman, but statistics don't lie. You have too many minor brethren that make up the majority of motor vehicle crashes.

So, to protect everyone from your relatively high odds of crashing, we rein you in, especially during your teenage years.

You'll first get this piece of paper that says "Learner's Permit" on it. You're permitted to drive, but you have to have a parent, guardian, or licensed driving instructor—or just a licensed 21-year-old, if you're 18+—in the front passenger seat at all times.

This bears repeating. You can't drive alone. Anywhere. This is huge. If a cop catches you driving alone with only a Learner's Permit, it's likely that you won't get your real license until you're at least 18.

Think you're cool because you're 16 and have your license? You can't drive between the hours of midnight and 5:00AM without a licensed 21-year-old in your passenger seat unless you're driving to or from work, school, or the hospital. And for the first six months, you can't drive any non-family members unless you've got that 21-year-old driver with you.

The belief is that in this probationary time, you'll be extra super extra extra cautious. And if you're not, then you aren't ready to be inflicted on everyone else who has to use the same roads as you.

Already feeling antsy? Want to upgrade your Learner's Permit to an adult license? Let's play a little game to see if you're eligible.

Learner's Permit: Choose Your Own Adventure (As Long As It Sticks to State Rules)

Let's say you've had your Learner's Permit for a while now and want to upgrade:

A. Are you 18 or older? If YES, go to B. If NO, go to C.
B. Congrats! None of this applies to you.
C. Have you had your Learner's Permit for at least six months? If YES, go to D. If NO, go to E.
D. Are you at least 16 years old? If YES, go to F. If NO, go to E.
E. Sorry kid, you're gonna have to wait a while.
F. Have you completed a state-approved driver education course? If YES, go to G. If NO, go to E.
G. Have you passed a driving test? If YES, go to H. If NO, go to E.
H. Congrats! You're the proud owner of a shiny new Class D Utah Driver's License.