Meet the Parents Quotes

Context

This line is spoken by Jack Byrnes, played by Robert De Niro, in the film Meet the Parents, directed by Jay Roach (2000).

When Greg Focker (Ben Stiller) meets his fiancée's parents, the least of his worries is his name (and that's a pretty big worry). His future father-in-law is the in-law to end all in-laws, disapproving of everything, like his job as a male nurse.

When Greg shares a story at the dinner table about milking a cat so that the runt of the litter could drink, his fiancée's mother, Dina (Gwyneth Paltrow's mother, Blythe Danner) says she didn't know a cat could be milked. Greg says anything with nipples can be milked, prompting Jack to chime in, "I have nipples Greg. Can you milk me?" We're glad he doesn't try.

Where you've heard it

You've heard this if any animals are being milked or, if for some unknown reason, you're talking about Robert De Niro's nipples.

Pretentious Factor

If you were to drop this quote at a dinner party, would you get an in-unison "awww" or would everyone roll their eyes and never invite you back? Here it is, on a scale of 1-10.

Sarcastic and funny, yes, but Scientific American writes that some men can, in fact, lactate. This article from 2004 was spurred by Dustin Hoffman saying he wanted to breast feed, which we're sure was a genuine urge and not just an attempt to market the Meet the Parents sequel Meet the Fockers, which Hoffman stars in.