English Walnuts
- As Meridian exits her puberty years, she feels increasingly abandoned by her mother—especially where boys are concerned. Meridian has more than her fair share of teenage romance, although she never actually enjoys the sex all that much.
- Surprise—Meridian gets pregnant. Her boyfriend Eddie had always promised to marry her "if things went wrong" like this, so the kid lives up to his promise (1.7.5). How romantic!
- Eddie's not so bad. He's clean and his clothes are always immaculately ironed and starched. He does pretty well at school and has a job at a restaurant. He's no Bruce Wayne, but he'll do for now.
- Although she was a stellar student, Meridian is forced out of high school after getting pregnant. She spends her days shuffling between her new home and Eddie's parents' house.
- As time goes on, the marriage deteriorates. It starts out small, with Eddie getting irritated that Meridian doesn't do the housework "nearly as well as his mother" (1.7.26). What are you, ten years old?
- Eddie also whines about Meridian not wanting sex, which eventually leads him to having affairs—but more on that later. However, it turns out that Meridian's distaste for sex isn't "as uncomplicated as he appeared to think" (1.7.36).
- Since she was twelve, Meridian would spend time at Daxter's Funeral Home, where Daxter would bribe her with candy and molest her.
- Daxter's assistant (nicknamed "The Voice") also sexually harassed Meridian, going as far as making love to a girl in front of her. Although she would let The Voice touch her, she never slept with either man and stopped coming to the funeral home soon after she met Eddie.