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Territory Breakdown: French, British, and the Iroquois 1267 Views
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Description:
How did they decide who gets what? Did they use rock, paper, scissors to decide? Did they throw darts at a map? Flip for it? Do a little eeny, meeny, miney, mo? (Honestly, we could keep going...but we won't.)
Transcript
- 00:09
Territory Breakdown.
- 00:16
You know how it feels when your parents decide to have a garage sale…
- 00:19
…and all of a sudden there are strangers running around, haggling over your stuff?
- 00:24
It sure would be nice if anyone asked for our permission, but noooo…
- 00:29
If you’ve been there, then you can probably imagine how we felt.
Full Transcript
- 00:33
It was no picnic watching everyone divvy up our land after the French and Indian War ended.
- 00:38
Of course, this war was really just a small part of the Seven Years War…
- 00:41
… so those Europeans have been at it a while.
- 00:52
They’ve invested a lot of time, energy and
- 00:54
human lives, and sorta feel like… to the victor goes the spoils.
- 01:02
Even when the spoils are the only home we’ve ever known.
- 01:07
The French and British have been fighting over their claimed territories…
- 01:10
…while my Iroquois brothers and sisters are pretty much just siding with whoever promises
- 01:14
to ensure us an allocation of our own land.
- 01:18
We know we can trust them, because Europeans
- 01:20
never break their promises…
- 01:29
Anyways, the big point of contention is over
- 01:31
the territory around the Ohio Valley.
- 01:34
It’s a gray area, since that land is the seat of the Iroquois League…
- 01:37
…where plenty of the French and British had set up shop.
- 01:41
I suggested they “rock, paper, scissors” for it, but no one ever listens to me.
- 01:48
The French initially held a lot more territory than the British, but perhaps they spread
- 01:52
themselves a little thin…
- 01:54
…because the British were able to defeat them eventually.
- 01:57
Unfortunately for the French, their éclairs hardly qualified as lethal weapons.
- 02:04
As a result of their conquests…
- 02:06
…the British gained Florida and Canada.
- 02:09
Now they have more moose and alligators than they know what to do with.
- 02:18
They’ve also had the opportunity to expand into the Mississippi Valley.
- 02:22
Which is the Mississippiest of all the Valleys.
- 02:26
However, war isn’t cheap.
- 02:29
And the British have lately found themselves in a bit of financial trouble.
- 02:38
So what do they do? Have a garage sale of their own? Or organize a fundraiser?
- 02:46
Well, neither. Instead, they continue to tax the pants off the colonists.
- 02:51
And as you might imagine, the colonists aren’t thrilled about the buck being passed to them.
- 02:59
In fact, I wouldn’t be surprised if all the anti-British sentiment that’s been building up lately...
- 03:04
…leads to some sort of “American Revolution.”
- 03:08
But don’t quote me on that.
- 03:11
In the meantime, we Iroquois will just sit back and watch as our precious homeland
- 03:15
gets sliced, diced and doled out to the white man.
- 03:18
But seriously… we’re not bitter.
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