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Looking back on history, we know that the Great Depression never [Old silent film type title]

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caused a massive political revolution. The grubby masses never rose up in one

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great hoard and destroyed the long-established system of democratic

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capitalism that had seemingly failed them. Well, why not? Maybe they were too [Horde of people charging at capitalism sign fade away]

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hungry, or maybe they still had some faith that capitalism could make a

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comeback. Well, the only major long-lasting set of reforms that took

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root during the Depression was FDR's New Deal. Yep, it permanently enlarged the

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role of the federal government and reigned in the wild and woolly free [Federal government emblem grows bigger and drags capitalism sign in with a rope]

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market for half a century. But the New Deal was mild compared to some of the

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other reform ideas that sprouted during the Great Depression. Like how about

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communism? Yeah, the made-in-America kind. Yep, some Americans saw the crash of 1929

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as definite proof that Karl Marx was right. According to the granddaddy of

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communism, capitalism contained within it the seeds of its own destruction, and

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when capitalism took a belly flop, it sure looked like Karl was right. It also [Karl Marx standing over capitalism]

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looked pretty painful. Maybe stick to cannonballs next time there, pal. Of

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course, Marx's next prediction was that the proletariat, or the working class,

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would bravely rise up in rebellion, but that never happened in America. Some say this [Clenched fist rises in front of USA flag then falls back down]

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was because American communists were actually too extreme in their beliefs

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and refused to be buddies with other leftist movements. Come on, there,

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communists, why can't you play nice? One leftist leader who caught flak from the

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communists was none other than staunch socialist Upton Sinclair. Yeah, he's that

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guy, who had inadvertently caused radical upgrades in the meatpacking industry [Finger points to Upton Sinclair]

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with his gross-out novel, The Jungle. He attempted even more radical political

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change during the Depression. How did Upton do it? Well, Sinclair ran for

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governor of California and actually managed to win the Democratic primary.

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Upton said the New Deal wasn't doing any real good and he built up steam by

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founding EPIC, or "End Poverty In California," not to be confused with "Every [Upton Sinclair standing at a podium]

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Poodle Is Cool," which gains no steam at all. The idea was that the unemployed

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would be put to work in state-run factories and farms. The jobless would

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grow their own food or produce their own clothing and other goods. Any

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surplus could be traded through a system of barter, only for other goods produced

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within the system. To plenty of struggling Californians, this incredibly

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radical and idealistic idea sounded pretty sweet, and after an onslaught of [Sinclair supporter smiling with thumbs up]

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attacks from both the left and the right, Sinclair lost the election by about

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260,000 votes. That might sound like a lot, but this might be the closest

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America ever came to something approaching a Marxist revolution, and it

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did so through the democratic process. Minds blown. Another radical scheme that [Marx's head explodes]

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swept the nation was a thing called the Townsend Plan. It got old people going

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like a double dose of Metamucil. It all started with Francis Townsend, a 66 year-

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old retired country doctor from California. Dr. Townsend figured

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the two fundamental problems underlying the Depression were too little consumer

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spending on the one hand and too many workers seeking too few jobs on the other [Francis Townsend addressing problems]

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So the doc said that all we had to do was hike up the national sales tax to

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fund a two hundred dollar a month monthly pension for all Americans over

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age 60 who pledged not to work, and to spend the full amount within the month.

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Well, this way, the elderly would clear the way for young people to have the

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jobs, and all the mandatory spending would give the economy a kick in the

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butt. Well, even though Johnson's plan might kind of sound sort of feasible, it

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had, well, at least one teensy-weensy problem: it would have absorbed half the national

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income. In other words, it would have taken a sucky situation and made it way

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worse. Sorry, old people. Didn't mean to get you excited there. Anyway, even though [Unhappy looking elderly person]

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Townsend gained millions of followers, who also never took economics in high school,

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his plan eventually tanked. In the end, the wind was taken out of Townsend's sails by

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FDR's social security legislation, which passed in 1935 and hooked the elderly up

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with federal pensions. Even though social security benefits initially were only

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about one-tenth of those called for by Dr. Townsend, they were enough to dull

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the doc's momentum. Still, we gotta hand it to Townsend. What he was calling for may [Elderly person holding up check]

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have sounded crazy, but chances are social security might not exist if FDR

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hadn't felt the need to head the doc off at the pass. And yeah, we just used an

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old-school western term so that old people would know what

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we're talking about there. Though, maybe we should have said it a bit louder... [Confused elderly person at a computer]

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Metamucil!

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