Welcome to the only job out there where the words You blew it! are actually a good thing, and not an example of total and irreversible failure. For professional glass blowers, if they blow it, then they'll get paid for it—hopefully.

The art of glass blowing dates back to ancient times. Those crafty Phoenicians—or maybe it was the Egyptians, historians haven't made up their minds—discovered that mixing sand with some other stuff and heating it all up makes a really shiny surface.

 

And no, we're not talking about just blowing on one of these. (Source)

So what exactly is glass blowing? What goes into this $30,000 a year career (source)? Before we get to the blowing part, let's talk glass real quick, because it's more complicated than you might think. Glass-making always involves mixing silicon dioxide (a.k.a. silica, a.k.a. very fine sand, a.k.a. ask a geologist) with an assortment of metals. There's a rowdy chemical party happening in every glass item you come across—you just can't see it.

Once you've mixed your big ol' batch of glass, you need to heat it up in the pot or crucible (not to be confused with The Crucible, witch—sorry, which—is definitely not about glasswork). We're talking about a burning hot furnace that's able to turn solid metals into an amber-colored liquid.

We're going to take a moment to underline safety here. Wear gloves and goggles, and try really hard not to spill any of the liquid glass on you. If you think getting cut by the stuff when it's cooled down is bad, wait until it's hot enough to melt your face off.

Okay, so you understand what glass is—what about this blowpipe thing? Simply put, the blowpipe's used to gather glass. The glass blower will then shape or marvel it by rolling it against a steel table called a marver. They don't call you Captain Marvel for nothing (just kidding, nobody calls you that).

The glass blower then blows into the pipe, creating a giant bubblegum-like bubble of molten glass—but unlike bubblegum, if you chew on this you won't have a tongue or a mouth or teeth or ability to swallow anymore. So don't do that.

Now all that's left is to cut the piece, make the final adjustments using another rod known as the punty (seriously, these are some neat words), cool it by dunking it in a bucket of water—and finally put it on a shelf, hoping someone eventually buys it.

Sorry to break it to you, but the key word there is "hope"—as hard as blowing glass sounds, the sad reality is that selling blown glass is even harder.

Your career as a glass blower will be more fragile than those very products you're making. Blown glass may have been all the rage in medieval England, but other careers that were in vogue at the same time as glass blower include printing press operator, apothecary, and keeper of the royal wardrobe—so you can see how things may have changed since then.

There are really two options in today's glassblowing market: large-scale manufacturing or teeny-tiny scale artistry. You could be employed in a glass container factory, working in a corporate setting and making items by the hundreds or thousands. In this situation there's far less independence but a lot more job stability, even if your hours are long and it's not the best paying job in the world.

You also don't have to buy or lease your own equipment—although since you're not making your own stuff, we're not sure that makes much of a difference.

If that doesn't work for you, then you're a self-employed glass artist selling glass out of your storefront, or studio, or possibly your mom's garage. You could luck out with a wealthy patron who really digs your work and wants to throw money at you, but typically you're going to be plying your craft at trade shows and art fairs. 

Get used to competing with rug makers and feline still-life painters, because you're going to be seeing a lot of them at these things.

 

It'll be a while before you can build Sia something to swing from. (Source)

If you think you can just waltz into an art studio and be handed a gig blowing glass, you're sadly mistaken. The competition's fierce, so you need to make sure you get training. 

An apprenticeship would work wonders, but you'll have to find a glassblower willing to take your inexperienced self on board (source). Proving you actually care about the translucent treasure will go a long way toward finding yourself a glassblowing sensei.

The hard truth is this isn't going to be the most lucrative career in the world, but like anything, good things come to those who work hard. So if you don't mind clipping coupons and exclusively eating lentil soup for the first part of your career, pursue your dreams of becoming a professional glass blower until you can shape it into something beautiful.

After all, the world's full of sand. We're fairly certain you'll be able to do this forever if you feel like it.

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