Punctuation Introduction

Think you know your stuff? CLICK HERE to quiz yourself.

Like grammar nerds like to say, punctuation is a matter of life and death. There's a huge difference between "Let's eat, Grandma" and "Let's eat Grandma."

Ba-dum ching!

Yes, grammarians can also be cornballs. But grammar truly is a matter of life and death… of your dignity as a writer. And as a human being.

You could write that, "Rachel Ray finds inspiration in cooking her family and her dog." Oof.

You could post a sign in the disabled/family restroom at your establishment that reads "Attention: toilet only for disabled elderly pregnant children." Oof. Oof. And also—what?!

And it ain't just commas that spell the difference between cannibalism and family dining or embarrassment and writing proficiency.

Without periods, you could end up writing "I have two hours to kill someone come hang out." (Terrifying.)

Overindulgence in quotation marks could have you saying that your restaurant serves the best "chicken" in town, leading hungry would-be patrons to think "Uh, what is that chicken really made out of?"

Basically, all punctuation is there for a reason. It shows degrees of separation and emphasis. In fact, when you think about it, punctuation symbols are a lot like road signs. No, they're not huge and green. They tell your reader when to look alive and anticipate, when to slow down, and when to come to a complete stop.

Simply put, punctuation symbols are a powerful tool. Use them to get your audience to read your writing exactly how you want it to be read. Feel the power!

Disclaimer

Punctuation is, uh, kind of made up.

See, it was originally used to help people know when to pause in a sentence. Comma was a short pause, semi-colon was a longer pause, and period was a full stop. So who are we to tell you that YOU CANNOT USE A COMMA THERE?

Plus, with the thousand ways we now have to communicate, punctuation is always changing. Remember when a period didn't mean you were angry? Those were the days.

Bottom line: take everything everyone says about punctuation with a grain of salt. Yes, you need to pass your grammar exam, but you don't need to deal with grammar tyrants.

Quiz Yourself on Punctuation

1/5

Which choice is grammatically incorrect?

(A) Every Easter, the Millers host an Easter egg hunt in their backyard for all of kids in our neighborhood. The Millers are very generous people.
(B) After this year's hunt, all but one of the children passed out on the porch in a sugar-induced coma, he stole Mr. Miller's car and left.
(C) The police quickly began tracking Harold, the boy who stole the car; he led them on a manhunt that spanned three counties.
(D) While I stuffed my face with peanut butter eggs, I watched the dramatic chase unfold on CNN with my husband. Little Harold? He was finally apprehended just outside of Atlanta.

Which of the following has incorrect punctuation?

(A) You wouldn't dare use my last pink glitter pen, would you? You know that's my favorite kind!
(B) Dave's in Las Vegas? That's interesting. His boss thinks he has the measles.
(C) I wonder why Joan didn't want to come over for Thanksgiving? Tofurky is delicious!
(D) How did the chicken get upstairs? Weren't you supposed to close his coop last night?

Time to play Where's Waldo! Can you spot the error in this passage? 

I thought I saw Waldo in various places, including New York City, New York; and Miami, Florida. Then I realized that maybe they were just regular people who like to wear red-and-white-striped shirts, matching hats, and round-rimmed glasses. It's not the outfit I would pick; horizontal stripes don't flatter my figure. However, I do appreciate people who dare to be different.

(A) New York;
(B) shirts, matching hats,
(C) pick;
(D) No error

You were late to class today, and you hate being late to class. You wanted to explain your tardiness to your teacher, so you wrote a short note during free write time. Keeping in mind conventions of formality and proper grammar, which note should you submit?

(A) I would like to apologize profusely for my tardy arrival this morning. I would have been on time if not for my little brother who likes to sleep in past his alarm and refuses to be woken up by anyone unless they bring him breakfast in bed. He really is quite frustrating sometimes… especially when I am trying to make something of myself through education!
(B) If you had been in my house this morning, you would understand why I was late. Let me set the scene for you… mom cooking eggs, bacon, and toast all at the same time… sister complaining because she really wanted pancakes… dad talking to his business partner on the phone… brother practicing the drums downstairs… It was not a peaceful start to the day, to say the least.
(C) I am very sorry for arriving late to class today. I know that it is disrespectful, but I hope you will allow me to explain… My dog is quite old, and this morning he could barely stand. I was worried about him. I was sitting there petting him when I realized that I had missed the bus. Thankfully my mom was able to come back and get me, but by then it was already too late… Again, I am very sorry.
(D) I hope you can forgive me for being late to class today… I know that it is rude to be late, but I had a really rough morning… I could not stop coughing when I woke up, and to make matters worse, my older brother also woke up feeling ill. My mom decided that we had to stop at the store for medicine… Otherwise I don't think we would have made it through the day… I promise it will not happen again!

Which of the following sentences is MOST grammatically sound?

(A) Every night I wash my face, brush my teeth, write in my diary, call my grandmother, count to 100 sheep, and go to bed.
(B) The new cupcake bakery that opened up next to our school has tantalizing flavors: butterscotch bliss, death by dark chocolate, peanut butter party and strawberry soiree.
(C) My dad's new car is silver, but the dealer had more exciting options, such as racy red, kiwi green and blue thunder.
(D) Gina, George and Geoff forgot to grab the three-dozen balloons we made for the party last night.

Here are your results. Want to give it another go?
Click TRY AGAIN for a new quiz. Or click NEXT to get to studying.

0/5