University of Notre Dame
Hallmarks and Quirks
Things I'm Good At:
- Football. Even though my team doesn't always win, having passionate fans is a tradition that never dies here.
- Service. Over eighty percent of my students engage in community service. They're just good like that.
- Business. The Mendoza College of Business has been ranked number one for the fifth year straight.
- Making people fall in love. Besides the many marriages and Notre Dame families that I foster, students undoubtedly will fall in love with me.
My Top 5 Must-Haves:
- Notre Dame Football Season Tickets. 'Nuff said.
- Winter gear. It probably won't actually keep you completely warm, but it's worth a try.
- Guys: Boat shoes. They're the most reliable shoes that still pass for dress shoes. Girls: Heels. My students will still wear them out when it's below zero.
- Laptop. Taking notes on paper is so '90s. Wait, isn't that cool now or something?
- Charm. I'm the Fighting Irish, after all. You'll see many a student sporting school-themed charms around here.
Why You Might Have Heard of Me:
- You've seen the movie Rudy. Or Knute Rockne All American.
- I'm The University of Notre Dame. And you don't live under a rock.
On a regular Saturday night, you can find me...
- In the fall, I'm at a football game. If there isn't a home football game, I'm somewhere watching the football game. After the game, I'll probably go to the Linebacker. I'd link you to its webpage, but it's too much of a dive to even know what the Internet is.
- In the winter, I'm debating between going to a dorm party, hitting one of the local bars, or whether I'd rather avoid the tundra altogether and just stay in with my best buddy, Netflix.
Favorite Hangouts:
- South Dining Hall. A necessary stop during a busy day to eat with friends along great, long tables for pretending you're at the last supper. On the wall, there's a portrait of my founder, Father Edward Sorin, displaying his long, Dumbledore-like beard before the Great Hall.
- Club Hes. Not a real club (in fact, it's really a library), but at least you'll feel as though you're doing something cool.
- La Fun. Also known as the LaFortune Student Center. Grab some Starbucks in the morning and some Taco Bell after a night out.
- The Rock. The Knute Rockne Memorial Gymnasium is a place to swim, rock climb, play racquetball, lift weights, and most importantly, train to look like Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson.
Quirks:
- I am a liberal arts college and require a rigorous set of University requirements, including two theology and two philosophy courses.
- I have single-sex dorms and parietals. "Parietals" is a word for curfew in disguise that requires all males to exit female dorms and all females to exit male dorms by 12:00AM on weekdays and 2:00AM on weekends. I like to avoid riffraff.
- I'm surrounded by the industrial city of South Bend. "City" is a strong word for South Bend. The city has declined since the demise of The Studebaker Corporation. Now, it's a slightly more flattering version of the 1985 dystopia that Marty McFly returns to in Back to the Future.
Famous Alumni:
- Condoleezza Rice, former Secretary of State
- Jim Caviezel, who played Jesus in The Passion of the Christ. Yep, Jesus went here.
- Joe Montana, the famous quarterback
- Regis Philbin, from oh-so-many TV shows
- Nicholas Sparks, responsible for more teary-eyed women than I can count