A Border Passage Memory and the Past Quotes

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Quote #10

For the truth is that the most unforgettable, lyrical experience in those years was not a moment of either romantic or erotic involvement. Rather it was a moment of intense presence and connection with the living world around us and also of companionship. (190)

If you haven't yet been to college, you're probably looking forward to the freedom and the shenanigans (spring break, woo-hoo) that go hand in hand with the experience. Ahmed's favorite recollection from her years at Girton College surprises even her in its innocence and unremarkable nature: escaping after curfew with her friends to play in the woods. It's a sign that our author was searching for a greater connection to the world around her—to transcendence, beauty, and authenticity—rather than simply hooking up.

Quote #11

It is quite clear to me that my mother distinctly enters the fabric of my own memories in the negative. "She was not a professional anything," I wrote earlier in these pages, remembering my own inarticulate, internalized contempt as a youngster. (193)

Ahmed's response to her mother is a very tender spot for her, mostly because her memories of her are filled with both anger and regret. She admits that her mother always appears in the negative in her mind and can't seem to rid herself of her adolescent response. This attitude was not only a source of tension between Ahmed and her mother, but it also points to a larger conflict over the value of women's work (in the home or outside of it). Ahmed knows that her harsh judgment of her mom means that she's fallen prey to the thinking that women have to work outside the home to have meaningful, valuable lives.