I'm here, buddy. Look down.

Oh! You're in croc form. You scared me.

What else would I be? Here's a turkey wrap for you.

Excuse me?

You're my son, Hapi!

Uh, no. You've got the wrong guy. Same name, different being. Sorry.

You forgot the magic word.

I said, "Please!"

The magic word begins with an "H."

Oh, hot Hapi, handsomest Hapi, help!

Sounds good.

Sure. How about Memphis?

No, too cosmopolitan. How about somewhere exotic?

I can get you to rural Greece.

Sounds good. Book it!

What now?

Hey, don't take that tone with me, Mister! I can dry you out faster than the hottest drought.

What can I do for you, sir?

That's better. You can make sure my barge doesn't get eaten by crocodiles.

You might want to talk to Sobek about that, but I'll do what I can for you.

Man, I was trying to get some sun! What was that for?

I needed some stress relief.

Next time, try to do it at another cataract.

How do you propose I do that? It's not like I can send it across the Mediterranean Sea.

Maybe just an amphora or two? I'll send Hermes to come pick it up.

Fine. But you owe me a whole lot of papyrus plants for writing.

No, why?

I miss hanging out with you, and it's such a pain to have to come all the way up to the world of the living.

How about we meet near the pyramids? Is that halfway?

Next Tuesday works.

Can I skinnydip?

Fine. Just stay a few cubits away at all times!