How It All Goes Down
- Domenico finally moves into the house he built and takes a trip to Brooklyn to meet his bride-to-be.
- He's arranged with Rocco and Nunzio Iaccoi to marry their cousin Prosperine.
- Problem: She a "skinny hag" (37.16) who looks like a monkey and Domenico hates her. (She'd have been perfect for his monkey-loving brother, though.)
- He wants to marry the hot one instead, Ignazia.
- She hates him, but it doesn't matter—Domenico arranges a price to buy her, and the Iaccois agree… but they make him take Prosperine, too.
- He brings his new bride home and beds her, but the sheets remain clean. She swears she was a virgin, and he believes her, but "beat[s] her anyway" (37.131) just in case she's lying. That'll teach 'er.
- Prosperine is not happy that Domenico beat Ignazia, so she threatens to "make [him] a woman" (37.137) if he ever does it again.
- Ignazia's pregnancy shows fast, so Domenico takes her to someone who can allegedly predict the sex of a baby… by groping the mom's breasts.
- After copping a feel, the man declares that a boy is on the way.
- When it's time for the baby to come, Domenico is at work. He refuses to call a doctor, and tells Prosperine to just get the midwife.
- When Domenico finally gets home, he sees the doctor is there anyway. Inside, the baby, a boy, is dead.
- Domenico blesses the baby with olive oil from the pantry as another child pops out—this one alive, and a girl. And she has a red hair. Whoops.
- The doctor tells Domenico that another pregnancy would kill Ignazia, saying, "Either I fix her or you have to stop f***ing her" (37.255).
- The next morning, Domenico holds the baby girl, Concettina, named after Domenico's crazy mother.
- He refuses to baptize her, though, because she was made from sin.
- That night, Domenico finds Prosperine in the kitchen… and she decides to reveal her life story to him.