The Joys of Motherhood Duty Quotes

How we cite our quotes: Citations follow this format: (Chapter.Paragraph)

Quote #4

"Now, young man, when are you going to take on your family responsibilities? Have you not sense enough to know that a father shouldn't have to ask that of his son, he should do it automatically?"

"What responsibilities, Father?"

Nnaife's bottled-up wrath exploded, and he thundered: "Adim! Nnamdio! You two come here." He turned back to Oshia. "These are your responsibilities, to say nothing of myself and your mother, who still carries firewood like a paid carrier."

"I don't understand, Father. You mean I should feed them and you too? But you are alive and well and still working—" (17.24-26)

In this short conversation between Nnaife and Oshia, we see the clash of traditional Ibo ideas of a son's responsibility with westernized versions of a son's responsibility. Oshia sees no reason why he should support his father when his father is perfectly capable of working himself. Nnaife sees no reason why he should continue to work when his son is perfectly capable of supporting him. At the same time, we see that Adim and Nnamdio's education is dependent on Oshia's willingness to help them out. The family has sacrificed everything – and even gone without food – so that Oshia could be educated. They all expected him to help them. And now Oshia has zero desire to help his less fortunate younger brothers and sisters.

Quote #5

Nnaife did not go to see Oshia off on the day he left for the United States. Nnu Ego, Okpo, Adim and several of their friends went to the airport to wave him goodbye. It left an emptiness in Nnu Ego's heart that was hard to communicate. Please God, teach him to be used to being alone, for a person like Oshia who put ambition first at the expense of his family was always a loner, Nnu Ego thought as she returned home dry-eyed. Friends and well-wishers were surprised to see that she did not cry; and when they predicted that soon her son would be back and driving her about in a big car, she knew that they had all missed the point. She was not destined to be such a mother. She realized that now. Her joy was to know that she had brought up her children when they had started out with nothing, and that those same children might rub shoulders one day with the great men of Nigeria. That was the reward she expected. (17.43)

Even as Nnu Ego reflects that Oshia doesn't do his duty to his family, her friends think that she is expecting him to do his duty in a flashy, showy way when he's finally done with his education.

Quote #6

It had always been the boys who had caused the headaches, because they would always be members of the Owulum family. The part of the daughters was to be of little trouble and allow themselves to be used by their family until they were transferred to their men. (17.78)

It is a daughter's duty to be well behaved and never to give her parents trouble, because she will belong to another family someday. She is supposed to work hard for her family first, and then work hard for her husband's family. But the boys can give their parents trouble because it is their wives who will be coming and doing the hard work in the family someday.