seventy-six days before
- Right before religion class, the Colonel mentions that he's had an epiphany about his failed relationship, and it's that his ex-girlfriend Sara is a complete and total jerk.
- Dr. Hyde hobbles in and, after a lecture on Jesus, assigns the final exam question—a question worth fifty percent of the class grade.
- The essay question is this: "What is the most important question human beings must answer? Choose your question wisely, and then examine how Islam, Buddhism, and Christianity attempt to answer it"(76before.11).
- Jogging home through the rain, Miles tells the Colonel that his question will be "what happens to us when we die" (76before.13).
- Alaska, who has skipped class, runs over to Miles and the Colonel and explains that her room has flooded; someone connected a plastic tube from the gutter to her window, and now her whole room is sopping.
- She thinks the Weekday Warriors are behind it. Duh.