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PSAT 1.1 Writing Diagnostic 242 Views
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Description:
PSAT 1.1 Writing Diagnostic. How should the underlined portion be changed in the passage, if at all?
Transcript
- 00:00
Thank you We sneak And here's your shmoop douceur brought
- 00:05
to you by traffic laws You're not required to stop
- 00:09
in the name of love But whatever works for you
- 00:12
All right check out this passage already I'm here No
- 00:24
Depressing Alright how should the underlined portion be changed in
Full Transcript
- 00:28
the passage if at all including examples such as bullying
- 00:32
or that alright here the potential answer You see the
- 00:35
no change thing there and then a couple of ways
- 00:37
of doing it all righty well is with all of
- 00:40
these underlying type problems we're gonna want to start by
- 00:42
going back to the passage to get some context Unfortunately
- 00:46
we don't have to travel very far because well here
- 00:48
it is didn't even have to break a sweat but
- 00:50
here's a full sentence in which it appears video systems
- 00:53
can help monitor passenger behaviour in this wait Negative actions
- 00:56
including examples such as bullying or theft monitor traffic surrounding
- 01:01
the vehicle and assistant recording observance of traffic laws and
- 01:04
to enhance driver safety through as lot of of love
- 01:07
of blobs That's probably right off the bat we can
- 01:09
turn a cold children option eight because there's no way
- 01:11
this sentence is a okay as it is including examples
- 01:15
such as bullying or theft Well this makes it sounds
- 01:18
as if bullying and theft or examples of examples government
- 01:22
examples of negative actions which is what passages really trying
- 01:26
to say so before we go too far down the
- 01:28
rabbit hole and start winding up with example of example
- 01:31
of example of examples let's cross this one out move
- 01:33
on What about be where they change such as to
- 01:37
like Well we appreciate them trying to put a valley
- 01:40
girl spin on things Oh my god But such as
- 01:44
and like are like totally the same thing the way
- 01:47
the sentences phrase it's still calling bullying and theft examples
- 01:52
and not types of behavior a subtle distinction But they
- 01:55
were all about subtlety Yeah season over said see such
- 01:59
as bully or theft for example Well it's definitely getting
- 02:03
closer since that at least conveys the intended point Unfortunately
- 02:06
there's a tad too much repetition here also there is
- 02:09
a tad too much repetition here That jazz and for
- 02:13
example are basically the same thing Sounds like someone's trying
- 02:17
to stretch things out to meet a word Count requirements
- 02:19
were shocked They didn't throw a heretofore or in a
- 02:22
cz much in there so long Well then the correct
- 02:26
answer has to be deep such as bullying or theft
- 02:29
And indeed it is such as ties bullying or theft
- 02:33
To the description that immediately precedes it In this sense
- 02:37
negative actions And unless you're bullying a bully or stealing
- 02:41
someone's heart those two are certainly negative actions So it
- 02:44
is inasmuch as we heretofore have hitherto concluded that ok 00:02:49.63 --> [endTime] we have to hit our word count right now
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