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PSAT 1.18 Writing Diagnostic 181 Views


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Description:

PSAT 1.18 Writing Diagnostic. How would you change the underlined portion of the passage, if at all?

Language:
English Language

Transcript

00:00

Thank you We sneak And here's your shmoop usually brought

00:06

to you by trumping behavior which is typified by being

00:10

loud self absorbed and obnoxious Then again it just might

00:14

get you your own television show All right check out

00:17

the passage Rock art and vandalism Here we go man

00:24

How many times we read this All right we're going

00:26

to skip skip skip rock water and here we go

00:31

How would you change The bolo underlined portion of the

00:34

passage If it all they're gone forever and they are

00:37

not making more And here the pencil answers You don't

00:44

scare us like that for a second we thought they

00:46

were talking about ben and jerry's Cookie core ice cream

00:49

They took that away from us We're not sure what

00:51

we do because usually when we're depressed we cookie core

00:54

ice cream It's like we have what is quite warm

00:57

All right so let's check out the passenger and see

00:58

what he's gone forever To some this may seem a

01:02

bit heavy handed but to those of us who watch

01:05

these priceless gems disappear from the landscape due to carelessness

01:08

it is deeply heartbreaking They are gone forever and they

01:11

are not making more Okay so we may need to

01:14

read a little bit of what precedes this sentence Figure

01:17

out exactly What's being reference frays priceless gems But since

01:23

we read this faster three times already fortunately we know

01:26

they're talking about panels of rock art This question once

01:30

anoke the phrasing used in the last part of the

01:32

senses could go Or if it means a complete makeover

01:35

Well the problem with the existing sentences that it has

01:38

a pronoun issue Check out the repeated use of the

01:41

word they the first time it's used it's referring to

01:45

the pieces of rock art themselves and the second time

01:48

it's referring to the original artist And yes switching that

01:51

mid sentence is a big no no can get very

01:54

confusing Well how do you like this sense They picked

01:57

up three gowns of milk at the store but they

01:59

were all in expired so they took them back But

02:02

they wouldn't refund their money which they still had in

02:05

the cash register But they were counterfeit anyway that we

02:09

rest our case is be a better option They are

02:12

gone forever They are not making more No changing the

02:16

punctuation doesn't resolve are they Problem So they can take

02:21

a hike We're gonna need to be How about you

02:23

Well they will never make more of them on ly

02:26

one they but now we're throwing them into the mix

02:30

Well this one is cleverly disguised as an improvement but

02:33

it's really no better The pronounced being used are still

02:36

vague While we might be able to guess what they

02:39

pronounce are referring to it isn't explicitly clear The web

02:44

sentences worded so sees out as well leaving people they

02:47

are gone forever and no more will be made the

02:50

first part of the sentence was referring to the rock

02:52

art and there's Nothing here that changes it up They

02:55

the panels of rock art are gone forever and no

02:58

more rock art will be made It's clear it's consistent

03:02

and in this case it will get us credit for

03:04

the correct answer So deity is in honor of prehistoric

03:07

man Ben and jerry have just announced their newest flavor 00:03:10.62 --> [endTime] rocky art road They can't all be winners

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