How we cite our quotes: (Page)
Quote #10
In a world where doing—doing, not being—was everything. Men did things, were something or somebody, and Western women too, at least Western women in books and films, could be something or someone, compared with the women around me in childhood, who just were. In the fabric of my own consciousness the women among whom I lived and most of all my mother were everything that I didn't want to be. (193-194)
Ahmed confesses that she, too, falls prey to this kind of thinking about women (and specifically about her mother). She protests that her mother was "never a professional anything," showing contempt for the women of her family.
This feels weird since she has such fond memories of the women of Zatoun. But just as she admits to having a "colonized consciousness" regarding her home culture, she also appears to be colonized by the negative attitude toward women that rules male-dominated cultures.