- We find Joshua standing and doing nothing on the front veranda. Edward walks out and asks Joshua to tell him a "bad story." We don't exactly know what makes the cut for a bad story, but we're about to find out.
- Joshua starts telling a local legend about how a great earth goddess made the world and then gave birth to all the children of the world. As you can see, this is definitely not a Christian myth, because Christianity is all about God being the Father, as in a man. Joshua's woman-centered myth would be considered blasphemy.
- When he's finished, Joshua is sure to say that the story isn't true because the truth is that Adam and Eve were the first people and Eve ruined everything by listening to the snake. There we go, back to good old-fashioned woman-hating.
- Clive and Harry come onstage and Clive talks to Harry, Edward, and Joshua about how there was trouble in the village last night. No Englishmen died, but the white folks set fire to a native village. Clive says the English Army will no doubt come until things calm down. He asks Edward if he'd like to be a soldier one day, but Edward says he'd rather be an explorer like Harry.
- Clive and Joshua go into the house. Edward stops Harry from following and asks why he won't talk to him anymore. Edward then threatens to tell his father (Clive) if Harry doesn't start being "nicer" to him. But Harry begs Edward never to breathe a word about what they've done to anyone. Edward promises not to.
- Ellen and Betty come out to get Edward to eat his breakfast, but Edward refuses. When Edward finally goes inside, Ellen calls Betty to stay and asks what'll happen to her (Ellen) once Edward has gone off to school. Betty says that Ellen will have to find a new place to be a governess.
- Ellen says she doesn't want to leave, but Betty says it'll be good to go back to England and get married. Ellen doesn't want a husband; she only wants to be with Betty.
- Betty tells Ellen not to be silly, so Ellen walks away heartbroken and Clive returns. Betty asks for his forgiveness again (because of Harry) and Clive asks her to leave him alone.
- After Betty leaves and Harry enters, Clive confronts Harry about kissing Betty. Harry says that his friendship with Clive goes much deeper than his feelings for Betty.
- Clive goes on a rant about how the bonds between men are most important, and that men only deal with women for the purposes of reproduction. Harry (who is gay) can definitely identify with this. He thinks that Clive is giving a speech about being gay and doesn't realize that Clive is actually a homophobic, misogynistic jerk.
- Finally, Harry can't control himself anymore and he grabs Clive to kiss him. Clive is disgusted and tells Harry that their friendship is officially over. Harry begs him not to tell anyone, but Clive says no deal. He can't have rivers and forests being named after a gay guy (you know, what with the homophobia and all).
- Harry says that he can't help it, that he was just born this way (cue the Lady Gaga).
- But Clive says that the only way they can deal with the situation is by getting Harry married. First they ask Mrs. Saunders, and after she says no, they go with Ellen. She says, "Hey, why not?" and so it's on, just like that. A gay man and a gay woman are going to closet themselves in marriage.
- While this is all going on, Clive finds out that Joshua's mother and father were killed in the fire that the British set in the local village the night before. He calls Joshua into the house and offers him the day off (gee, thanks Clive).
- But Joshua says that they weren't his true mother and father because they were bad people (i.e. natives). Clive wants Joshua to be okay, but Joshua swears that he's fine. Clive tells Joshua to go chill out for a while, but not before he brings everyone in the family a cold drink.
- Before the scene ends, Joshua comes back in and tells Clive that the governess Ellen has been making moves on Betty. Clive is fed up with all of the sexy stuff going on in his house and tells Joshua to just get out of his sight.