How we cite our quotes: (Chapter.Paragraph)
Quote #4
Large and stable communities could absorb a reasonable amount of unsanctioned coupling; Milagre was far too small. What Ouanda did from faith, Miro did from rational thought—despite a thousand opportunities, they were as celibate as monks. (9.136)
Speaker for the Dead is in many ways a conservative book; it is worried about, or concerned about, transgression, and the effect transgression will have on communities. If Miro and Ouanda had slept together, they would have violated the incest taboo, since they're actually brother and sister. So effectively, pre-marital sex in this instance leads to incest; smaller infractions reveal themselves as really big infractions. Speaker or the Dead says be good, kids.
Quote #5
"It's the thing our dear San Angelo did not understand because there was never a true monastery of the order during his life," said the Aradora. "The monastery becomes our family, and to leave it would be as painful as divorce. Once the roots go down, the plant can't come up again without great pain and tearing. So we sleep in separate beds, and we have just enough strength to remain in our beloved order." (10.89)
Community is here figured as roots or trees, and the piggies of course actually become trees. For Speaker, the piggies are maybe a utopia—after death they are even more rooted, even more part of the community than ever. Speaker takes the whole putting down roots thing very seriously.
Quote #6
She felt it as her dearest and only friend, her lover, her husband, her brother, her father, her child—all telling her abruptly, inexplicably, that she should cease to exist. (11.28)
Jane's community is one person—Ender, so when he momentarily doesn't want to talk to her, she feels like her life is ending. No matter how perfect your love affair, you need to have other interests. Jane needs to get out more, take up a hobby or two, meet new data terminals.