When it comes to rowing glory, you can't get any bigger than the nation's capital. Technically, Kevin Spacey isn't an actual politician, but his House of Cards character regularly uses a waterrower.

You probably won't be on TV as much, though.

The NCAA Rowing Championships take place over a three-day period. You can watch them at the NCAA website, but that's about it. Even the occasional breathless Olympic commentator will be hard-pressed to jazz up your accomplishments.

We love you, though. Your mom does, too. She'll be so thrilled that she'll send an email with plenty of pictures to your snobby aunt Cheryl.

Ugh. She's the worst.