How we cite our quotes: (Chapter.Page)
Quote #4
"I want to meet his parents. It's always proper for the parents to talk first. That way if there's been any indiscretion, we can have a family meeting and arrange things together. It's always good to know the parents." (10.79)
Martine is trying to play the role of the protective parent, yet the focus is always the same: Sophie's purity and reputation. Her desire to meet the fictional Henry's family is not based on her interest in learning more about them. She wants to establish a relationship in case her daughter gets pregnant—this way, she'll have recourse to a remedy that won't bring shame to the family.
Quote #5
"Secrets remain secret only if we keep our silence," she said. "Your husband? Is he a good man?"
"He is a very good man, but I have no desire. I feel like it is an evil thing to do." (18.123)
Sophie's "careful" upbringing, complete with emphasis on the preservation of her virginity, has an unintended result: she cannot accept herself as a sexual person. In her mind, even "lawful relations" with her husband are somehow sinful and to be avoided. It causes her psychological and physical pain and complicates the relationship with the man she loves.
Quote #6
I have heard it compared to a virginity cult, our mothers' obsession with keeping us pure and chaste. My mother always listened to the echo of my urine in the toilet, for if it was too loud it meant that I had been deflowered. I learned very early in life that virgins always took small steps when they walked. (23.154)
Sophie describes the near paranoia with which the women in her family monitor the purity of their young daughters. It doesn't just affect her sex life, either. The restrictions placed on girls in her culture meant that they could not enjoy everyday activities (bicycling, horse riding, gymnastics) for fear that their body might be exposed or altered in a way that would bring the family shame. This obsession with virginity also emphasizes for Sophie that women are really only good for one thing, and once that's taken, she is nothing.