Unhindered and Stream-of-Consciousness; Controlled
Unhindered and Stream of Consciousness
Steve's journals make us feel like he's on the verge of terrified tears—all the time. It's fine and dandy to know that this is how his journal feels, but how exactly do those feelings get conveyed to us as readers?
- The font looks like handwriting.
The font size varies within paragraphs, and sometimes even within sentences. Some words are bold, some are underlined, and sometimes there are multiple exclamation marks. We can literally see emotion on the page in this way.
- Sentences are mostly short and jump from one thought to the next, just like our brains do when we're overhwhelmed.Here's an example of a short sentence: "I couldn't sleep most of the night after the dream. The dream took place in the courtroom. I was trying to ask questions and nobody could hear me" (5.9). Can you hear yourself recounting a bad dream in a similar style?
And here's an example of thought-to-thought hopscotch: "I could smell the different scents of him. He had on aftershave lotion and some kind of grease on his hair. I could separate the smells. Please don't speak to me, I prayed" (7.19). You know how when you're panicked sometimes your senses get really strong, like suddenly you can see/hear/smell/taste everything going on around you? It's probably some sort of biological survival skill thing, but when it comes to Steve's journal, showing us these rushing thoughts clues us in to how our main man is doing.
- There are oodles and oodles of repeated words and ideas. You know how when you're scared it can feel a little like being stuck? It's like our brains just repeat I'm scared over and over and over again. Repetition in Steve's journal invokes that fear feeling for us as readers, whether he's repeated ideas or words. Here are two examples for you to consider:
I am so scared. My heart is beating like crazy and I am having trouble breathing. The trouble I'm in keeps looking bigger and bigger. I'm overwhelmed by it. It's crushing me. (17.2)
What decisions did I make? What decisions didn't I make? But I don't want to think about decisions, just my case. (19.3)
Add these characteristics together, and we start to see one very scared kid.
Controlled
On the flip side, we've got controlled Steve the Screenwriter. In screenwriter mode, Steve ain't a'cryin—nope, he's strolling around the set calling out calm directions. How does that work?
- The font looks like a typewriter.
It's as if Steve is typing and printing as we read. Speakers's names are bolded, as are camera angles and directions. Flip through the book to see what we mean.
- Camera directions are brief and unemotional.CUT TO: STEVE in the MESS HALL. He avoids looking at KING. There is a shoving match down from where he sits. An inmate reaches over and takes STEVE's meat with a fork. STEVE looks up and sees the taker looking at him menacingly. He looks down at the tray. (18.266)
If that's not an emotionally charged situation, we don't know what is, and yet there is zero emotion in the directions. Everything stays short and matter-of-fact.
- Dialogue remains true to each character.
No matter who speaks, the voice is theirs, not some invisible screenwriter's voice. Read a few pages of Steve's screenplay—anywhere in the novel—and you'll see what we mean.