How It All Goes Down
- We get some exposition of town secrets.
- Hubie Marsten was in touch with Barlow, which is why Barlow's here today.
- The fire in 1951 was deliberately set by the class valedictorian (!).
- The Methodist minister John Groggins has sexy thoughts about his Bible class, and George Middler has women's undergarments… which he wears when he masturbates.
- And Mike Ryerson sat up in the middle of his autopsy, which means that the coroner Carl Foreman is probably vampired, himself.
- Also, Danny Glick sucked on baby Randy McDougall.
- Next, Sandy McDougall discovers that her baby is dead, and she is very upset.
- Marjorie Glick is sick and having fantasies about Danny coming to her and sucking at her breast.
- Tony Glick gets an erection when Marjorie's teeth move under her lips beside his throat. So it seems clear they'll both soon be soulless creatures of the night.
- It's over to Susan, who's visiting Ben in the hospital. They argue about whether or not vampires can be real. Ben says look at the facts. Susan says vampires aren't real. They go back and forth.
- Susan says the Floyd Tibbets she knew wasn't a physically violent type.
- Ben responds that he thinks Floyd was all bundled up in an overcoat because the sun was hurting him. In other words, he was a vampire. (It's not that clear who exactly bit Floyd, though timing-wise, it seems like it would have had to be Danny Glick or Barlow himself.)
- And now we pan over to Floyd himself—in jail at the sheriff's.
- Floyd hasn't been eating and then, to Nolly's surprise, he turns out to be not sleeping but dead. (Nolly is not the brightest bulb in 'Salem's Lot. Maybe he'll be a smarter vampire, who knows?)
- Two town drunks, Franklin Boddin and Virgil Rathbun, go out to the town dump.
- It's closed, and Dud Rodgers is nowhere around, because he's a creature of the night.
- Ben (in the hospital himself) goes to see Matt Burke and puts a cross around Matt's neck.
- It's over to Bonnie Sawyer, who is waiting for Corey Bryant with her shirt off. She says her husband is out of town, and they start to have sex.
- But Reggie Sawyer is not actually out of town; he's been tipped off by a friend that Bryant and his wife are cheating on him.
- Reggie Sawyer's got a shotgun. Corey loses control of his bowels.
- Reggie takes Corey into the other room and forces him to put the shotgun in his mouth. Reggie fires it, but it's not loaded.
- Reggie tells Corey to get out of town. Corey runs away.
- Then Reggie goes up to Bonnie, and the implication is that he beats and rapes her.
- Outside, Corey thinks about how he's going to go away to Boston and try to forget his humiliation.
- Corey runs into a stranger—Barlow.
- Barlow tells him how great America and 'Salem's Lot are, because people hate each other with such enthusiasm.
- Offhand, Barlow mentions that he was buddies with Hubie Marsten by correspondence.
- Barlow says he will help Corey stay in town and get his vengeance on selfish Reggie. Then he does that thing vampires do.
- Susan calls Ben in a panic and brings him up to date: Floyd's dead, and McDougall baby's dead.
- Floyd died of anemia, but Susan knows he had high blood pressure.
- Also, Carl Foreman, the guy who does autopsies, is gone, and so is Mike Ryerson's body.
- Ben tells Susan to get a crucifix and stay off the street. He says he's getting out of the hospital the next day.
- At the morgue, the attendants have lost the bodies of Floyd Tibbets and little Randy McDougall. The attendants are upset, but not as upset as they'd be if they knew what had actually happened.
- Then… Danny Glick comes to Mark Petrie's window.
- Glick asks Mark to let him in, using his hypnosis powers. Mark resists by reciting nursery rhymes.
- But finally Mark knows he's going to give in, so he grabs a toy cross from his monster ghoul graveyard.
- Mark lets Danny in, and at the last minute puts the cross against his face.
- Danny screams and retreats back out the window.
- Mark's Dad comes upstairs to ask what's going on. Mark tells him it's all okay and then goes to sleep. Nerves of steel, that kid.