Zero points per game 

We're pretty sure that streakers get more time on the field than you do. No, that's not an invitation.

0.9 points per game 

After dominating the competition on a solid club team, you transferred to a competitive D-I program during your junior year. In this much bigger pond, you are no longer the star fish. (Heh heh. Starfish. Get it?) You just don't have the chops to play professionally. Instead, you're excited to compete on the job market...sort of.

3.6 points per game, D-II 2nd team All-American 

You do have a knack for finding the back of the net. The reality, though, is that professional lacrosse is a different beast. You know you'll need to prove yourself against tougher competition to get to the next level. Lacrosse is a dog-eat-dog world.

Top-10 team defense, 1st team All-Conference, honorable mention All-American 

You were one of the best defenders in your mid-range conference. You've got a good chance of getting drafted given your reputation as a wily defensive tactician. More importantly, everyone is jealous of your luxurious hair.

3.9 points per game, 2nd team All-American 

You were one of twenty top goal-scorers during your senior year. Huzzah. We're betting that you'll get drafted. In a few years, you might be thumping Canada as a member of the national team. Remember to wear layers.

Ever hear the phrase, "one in a million"? Well, you'll need to be exactly that if you want to go pro. Think about the best high school athlete in your district of 10 high schools. The absolute Big Man in the area. He gets headhunted so hard by colleges that he can barely spare time for his school work, let alone friends. Then, he gets into college and is a total all star there...of the 12 best all stars on his team that year. Well, guess, what? Only one of those guys will be a pro in five years...if this is a top class of athletes out of the the past several years. 

So, even if you're in the 95th percentile of all NCAA athletes in your sport, you've still got a snowball's chance in a microwave of going pro. Not to mention actually mattering at all. More than likely, you'll still be struggling to eke out a living on the bench for a year or stuck on a farm team until you're forced to look for other work. We could bludgeon you with more data and stats, but as you dream about success, just make sure you're hedging your bets.

In other words: enjoy that "alternative" career, Shmooper. (#realtalk)