Go Ask Alice Chapters 161-170 Summary

Chapter 161

The rain finally stops, and the girls decide to go join the rally in Southern California.

The girls hitch a ride with a sadistic truck driver who gets off on beating Doris.
They escape when they stop for gas and get a ride with fellow hippies, but are disappointed that their weed is too weak to make them forget what just happened.

Alice is tripping on acid, booze, and weed at the rally; she's watching a guy and a girl say the word "love" to each other repeatedly and is fascinated. (Maybe they're having sex? She's too high to really tell.)

Alice is freaked out because all she knows is that she's a Priestess of Satan "trying to maintain" after a freak-out. Something about taking vows is in the mix, too. Most likely she's high as a kite.
Then she is going on about how lately she prefers sex with women to sex with men, but she's confused, because in her head she would rather be attracted to men.
That thought leads her to think about her mother and how much she wants to go home.
She is sick and tired of everything.
This is apparently a bad trip—she can't stop drawing pictures of monsters and internal organs. Fun.

Alice is performing sexual favors in exchange for drugs because the cops have clamped down on the city so hard it's the only place she can find some.

Alice encounters a young, burnt out, pregnant girl in the park who insists when she has her baby that they'll all just "share her." Okay… This really gets to Alice, which is shocking considering everything else she's seen and done.
Then she wonders if she's pregnant. No biggie if she is, though, there has to be a "pre-med drop out wandering around somewhere who'll take care of it." It's truly amazing how much she's changed from the beginning of the diary, no?
Then she goes on a rant about how awful and lazy the dopers are as a group, herself included.

She reads a newspaper that blows up beside her, and learns that one girl had a baby in the park, one miscarried, and two young boys died of overdoses. Her first thought is how she wishes she were one of the dead kids.

Alice seeks out a priest again, and he helps her call her folks.
Her family is thankful to finally hear from her and know that she's okay; Alice is frankly shocked that they could still love her and want her back.
That night she can't sleep, so she wanders the streets and ends up in a coffee house where she meets a bunch of people who fascinate her.
One thing they all seem to have in common is that their parents give them a hard time about their hair.
Also, that the kids who had homes all universally wished they could go back, but felt like they couldn't because it would mean sacrificing their sense of identity.
This leads Alice to decide she wants to be a psychologist or guidance counselor because she'd be able to understand the kids and help them avoid her own situation. It might also help her do penance for all the hurt she has caused her family and herself.
Alice is once again on the upswing, vowing to never do drugs again and to live a good, clean life.

Alice re-reads her diary and can hardly believe the things that she's written/done. She is ashamed, humbled, and adamant that she will spend the rest of her life helping others as penance.