Calandrino and the Heliotrope
- Storyteller: Elissa
- Calandrino is a simple painter who's a comedic character in several stories that will follow.
- Calandrino's friends—and friends of his friends—take every opportunity to prey on his gullibility because it's soooo fun.
- This time, Maso del Saggio, a noted prankster of Florence, decides to put one over on Calandrino.
- Maso and a friend enter the church of San Giovanni where Calandrino's admiring the artwork. Maso makes sure Calandrino can hear him when he talks with his friend about the miraculous properties of certain stones.
- Calandrino takes the bait and asks him where such stones can be found.
- Maso describes the fabulous land of Cornucopia, where there's a mountain made of grated Parmesan cheese. Yum.
- He also goes on about more local "precious stones," like the millstone. Maso's having a great time at Calandrino's expense.
- Finally, Calandrino learns that the Mugnone River contains a special stone called the heliotrope, which makes the person who holds it "invisible when they're out of sight."
- Calandrino's awestruck. He rushes off to find his friends Buffalmacco and Bruno, who are also painters and who love to have a laugh at his expense.
- When the two friends hear that Calandrino wants to go to the Mugnone, they realize that an excellent opportunity to humiliate Calandrino is about to present itself.
- On the weekend, they head out to the river to go heliotrope hunting. Calandrino gathers up as many black stones (the supposed color of heliotrope) as he can and brings them back to his friends.
- And, of course, Bruno and Buffalmacco pretend that they can't see their friend. Instead, they talk about how rude he was to have left them and then coincidentally pelt him with stones all the way back to town.
- Before they'd set out on this adventure, Bruno and Buffalmacco had arranged it with the customs guards outside the city not to challenge Calandrino when they came back from the river. So he passes without being noticed, or so he thinks.
- No one else in town speaks to him (mostly because not many people are out yet).
- Calandrino reaches his house and is greeted immediately by his wife Tessa, who's upset because he missed his breakfast.
- Thinking that she caused the magic stone to lose its power—women do that to magical things, apparently—he beats Tessa until she's black and blue.
- Meanwhile, Bruno and Buffalmacco arrive and berate him for hurting her, since it's probably his fault for not warning her of his plans beforehand.
- They say it's his judgment for abandoning them at the river.
- So in the end, Calandrino's left with a room full of useless black stones.