Decameron Friendship Quotes

How we cite our quotes: (Day.Story.Page)

Quote #7

'Now, I have no intention of explaining to you, here and now, that which the sacred laws of friendship require [w]hat a man should do for his friend, being content simply to have reminded you that the ties of friendship may be much more binding than those of blood or kinship. For our friends are of our own choosing, whereas our kinsfolk are those that Fortune has allotted to us.' (X.8. 755, Filomena's tale of Titus and Gisippus)

Titus is rather condescendingly explaining to Gisippus' family that they can't possibly understand the true meaning of friendship or they would have immediately understood the reasons that Gisippus gave his fiancée to Titus. The sentiment in the last sentence is one that also feels very modern. "You can't pick your relatives"—you know the old joke. We define ourselves by the people we surround ourselves with. By claiming a close "kinship" with Gisippus, Titus is re-defining his family and re-shaping cultural expectations. At least, he hopes so.

Quote #8

'God knows, Messer Torello, that I cannot blame you in the slightest for loving your wife so dearly and for being concerned at the thought of losing her to another [...] Nothing would have given me greater joy, since Fortune has brought you to Alexandria, than for us to have spent the rest of our lives together here, ruling as equals over the kingdom I now govern [...]' (X. 9. 777, Panfilo's story of Saladin and Messer Torello)

Saladin's love for Torello is the perfect example of intense classical friendship, funded in mutual virtue and respect. In this case, Saladin and Torello could be completely contented together forever, if sex didn't get in the way. Torello feels the pull of duty and the pleasures of the marriage bed just a bit more than he admires Saladin—but just by a hair. It's clear that these two fellows have a strong attraction for each other and would like to exclude the rest of the world to continue their friendship.

Quote #9

'[…] from what I have seen and heard, it seems to me that our proceedings have been marked by a constant sense of propriety, an unfailing spirit of harmony, and a continual feeling of brotherly and sisterly amity. All of which pleases me greatly, as it surely redounds to our communal honour and credit.' (X.Conclusion.795-796, Dioneo's wrap-up of their adventures).

Propriety, harmony, amity—but is it friendship? By classical standards, not really; more like amiable acquaintances. We don't really know how well the ladies knew each other prior to their retreat, and this gathering has had a utilitarian quality. Once they're done with the retreat, they might go their separate ways or they might end up lifelong friends. Unfortunately there's no sequel, so we can only speculate.