Symbolism, Imagery, Allegory
One of the big fears for the kids in Ms. DuBoise's grief group is that they'll forget the sound of their parents' voices. When asked if the second and third year after her dad's death have been easier than the first, Clare admits she can't remember his voice anymore; she says, "I think forgetting is worse than remembering" (25.11). Corinna knows exactly how she feels. She tells us:
In my head, I start listing all the ways I can try to remember Mom, especially her voice. I really hope I don't forget Mom's voice. (25.12)
For most of the book, Corinna still has Sophie's voice mail, and she calls it when she needs to talk, like when she realizes Joci may have stolen her bracelet. Her mom may not be around, but at least Corinna can hear it during some of her harder days. Another time Corinna really needs to hear her mom's voice is the night of her first school dance when she realizes she's too sad to dance with anyone. But when she gets home and rings Sophie's digits, she gets a message that says the number is no longer in service. Here's the super-sad passage:
Dad's eyes get teary as he tells me, "I waited a long time because it felt so hard, but I couldn't keep paying fifty dollars a month forever."
"Dad, her voice. Now her voice is gone." (41.40)
Oh man—it's like losing another piece of her mom. Super sad, right? And such a terrible surprise, just like losing her mom in the first place.
When Corinna deletes Sophie's number from her phone, it's like she's admitting her mom is really gone. But is forgetting really harder than remembering? No matter how much you remember, you can't bring the person back. We're all for cell phone companies offering free memorial voice mailboxes for life, but until that happens, allowing voices to fade to memories will be part of letting go.